Nothing is given. Everything is earned. Here’s how to do it:
“-Keep it light with them.
-Show them you care.
-Take genuine interest in them.
-Intently listen to them.
-Give them fist bumps & hugs.
-Thank them for the opportunity to coach them.
It’s amazing how much buy-in you get with athletes when you’re not an as*hole to them.”
-Ray Zingler on X
I want structure.
I want discipline.
I want to run a tight ship, too.
But here is the deal, you must earn the privilege of curating an environment where you can elicit, structure, discipline, and run a tight ship.
You don’t just get buy-in because you’re older than them, have a loudmouth, and a whistle.
Those guys get in their own way before the chute is even pulled open.
To “get what you want out of them” from a buy-in or dare I say “culture” perspective, you have to lay a foundation with them.
And to lay a foundation with them, you must ensure they want to be around you. Crazy idea, huh!?
But how do you do this?
You start by keeping it light with them.
Keep it loose. Turn the music on, go through the motions, a little bit. Show them that you’re not Coach “I Wish I Was A Navy Seal” Smith.
Show them you’re a regular guy who just wants to pull the rope in the same direction with them.
Simply show them that you care about them and seeing them become the best version of themselves that they can become.
Take a vested interest in them beyond what it is you’re coaching.
It’s not about strength & conditioning or lacrosse, right?
It’s about Riley and Sarah.
What are their hobbies? What do they like doing? What are their favorite foods?
Again, simple shit that people “don’t have time for anymore”, but it goes a long way when you show them that you truly care.
From there, and this is where many adults struggle, you must listen to them.
No, seriously listen to what they have to say and how they say it. And listen inbetween the lines, body language, facial expressions, all of it. They will tell you everything you need to know.
Love on them, fist bumps and hugs go a long, long way. It’s a vote of admiration for them.
Finally, thank them. Show them that you genuinely appreciate the honor associated with the privilege that is getting to coach them.
Then (and only then) watch how easy it is to “get what you want out of them.”
They are first, bro.
You are second & always will be.
