They’re merely camouflaging their inability to connect, teach, and resonate with their loud mouths.
“‘Hard coaching’ is only acceptable & only works when the kids you’re coaching know how much you care about them.
If you don’t take the time to build relationships rooted in trust, love, & respect, you’re not a ‘hard coach’.
You’re an asshole.
You’re not a difference maker.”
-Ray Zingler on X
You must earn the right to coach them hard.
And usually what happens within this quest to deliver “hard coaching” you find out that many kids don’t need their asses constantly chewed to get the most out of them.
I love the Nick Saban videos of him getting after his guys as much as anybody. But guess what. He’s earned that.
If you’re not on the level that Nick Saban is (was) at, you’re not as accomplished as Nick Saban, and you don’t have Nick Saban’s players.. guess what..
You’re probably better off not trying to imitate Nick Saban.
Most people in the (modern) coaching field who are self-proclaimed hard coaches, really aren’t hard coaches.
They’re assholes.
They are guys who don’t have the self-awareness, knowledge, or discipline to understand there is usually a better way. They are so stuck in their ways that they place self-imposed sanctions on their ability to grow…
As they yell at kids to grow and evolve.
Real tough, tough guy!
Don’t mistake my message.
I am not totally against hard coaching. Not at all. I’d love for my kids to be coached wildly effectively and if “hard coaching” is earned by a superior, by all means be tough on them when it’s appropriate.
But some jackass with a whistle, a bucket hat, and a loud voice dogging kids to run useless extra sprints, while his gut meat hangs over his waistband?
That’s not hard coaching.
That’s immaturity and a lack of self-discipline.
And those excuses of people certainly won’t have any access to my kids and they should have access to your kids either.
Why?
Because that doesn’t help them at all.
It creates resentment.
It burns bridges.
It doesn’t build “mental toughness”.
You know what builds mental toughness?
Consistently doing effective things efficiently & repeatedly.
Remember that the next time you see a guy yelling at kids who couldn’t run a single one of the conditioning tests he’s administering.
I find it funny that the best coaches can usually always walk the walk and often they aren’t the loudest with their words.
They talk with their actions.
Not their loud mouths.
Take a guess at which of the 2 coach examples have profoundly more positive impact on kids?
