They learn them when your words are lived by your example for them to follow.
“‘Overcome adversity!’
(Run to greener grass/join a new team.)
‘Be a team player!’
(Focus on your stat line.)
‘Commitment means commitment!’
(Cherry pick the portal.)
Contrary to popular belief, shouting cute buzz phrases at kids doesn’t actually teach them lessons.”
-Ray Zingler on X
I do not or will not blame the kids.
It’s not a kid issue.
Kids are merely products of their leadership.
They are products of their environment and what is tolerated within them.
As creatures who have evolved to take the path of least resistance & choose options that feel good (at least initially) over options that contain friction, is it any wonder they run from adversity when their “leaders” condone (fund) the behavior?
Work my ass off, have it not go my way, get punched in the face, and come out scarred with no trophy?
Or hire a videographer to watch me workout, get likes on social media, transfer to a super team, and then cherry pick the portal (free agency) so I can get even more attention on Twitter?
Mature adults know the long term value comes from the former option, but the kids are choosing the ladder.
Why?
Because it feels better and it’s accepted within their environments.
Wouldn’t you have chosen that option too when your frontal lobe wasn’t fully developed? Especially if your leaders condoned it? I know I likely would have, but fortunately for me, I didn’t have parents who tried to be my friend. I had parents who were parents.
Parents who saw the value in the long game. Value that I, at the time of the “unfairness” didn’t have the ability to comprehend.
It was my parents wisdom that saved me from entitlement.
I have rock solid values & a work ethic because they didn’t let me have it easy.
And that’s the problem in todays world.
We try so damn hard to shelter our kids from adversity that they end up missing out on all the value that comes with it.
Because here’s the deal, we can’t just “talk about the lessons”, kids actually have to consistently live them.
For years.
But we relegate the life stuff to a financially incentivized coach who doesn’t care about any of the life stuff.
“That’s not true!”
If he did, would the sporting landscape that takes more from our kids than it gives look this way?
There are many wolves in sheep’s clothing out there that we give a pass because they are “nice”.
But nice guys don’t teach valuable lessons.
Leaders embrace what’s right.
And what’s right is often hard.
Live the code.
